Friday, October 14, 2005

Where oh Where has the Routes Meister Gone?

No, I did not get hit by a car while looking the RENT soundtrack. In fact, I'm not even getting it anymore. If the record company distributing it doesn't distribute it near me and is for whatever reason preventing me from obtaining a copy, F them. I'll just wait till someone else gets it. That should show them.

Sorry. I got sidetracked. So yes, where the hell have I been indeed. I have been silently working. Like a fart tiptoeing passed its padded cell walls and into the nose of an unsuspecting passerby. I've been quietly minding my own mindful business engulfed in the business of life insurance. Did you know that the cash value of a variable life insurance policy is subject to US taxation if the value of the premiums in the first seven years exceeds the TAMRA premium purple monkey dishwasher? Think about it.

No you won't.

But yes, I've been working and that's about it. I can't think of anything productive I've done in the past few. Rest assured though, I will have more stories to tell. I have not yet jumped shark. For instance, I am in the process of collecting more spiders for my Ultimate Fighting Arachnid tournament. We'll see what happens when rollie pollies are thrown into the mix! Anyone who's anyone would be crazy to miss that!

I'm also in the process of thinking of doing a Halloween costume. What the hell should I be? Well whatever the case may be, I'll have some sort of picture up here. Last year I dressed up as David from Lilo & Stitch and when I went to Erico Suave's and MacArthur's Halloween party, the first thing I heard was "Oh. Another boring non-costume." Who was I to argue? It was easier just to admit to not dressing up than answer what the hell I was dressed as (as the costume was unconvincing itself). Have I told ya'll this already?

Also at work, I'm entering a pumpkin carving contest. This will be the first time I actually try to carve a pumpkin creatively. And what better way than just getting some pumpkin pattern stencils from the net? I've got my carving kit all oiled and ready. Of course I was forced into this at work being the youngest in my department, but it should be fun nonetheless. We also have to dress up our floor for some second graders stopping by to trick-or-treat around the cubicles. I am told that I must wear a costume that day. Will it be weird wearing my Scream killer costume on the train? Maybe I should put the knife away.

And lastly, back on September 15th, I wrote an angry ball of a rant on my blog which no one could possibly understand; partly because it never led anywhere. Well yes, contrary to popular propaganda, there was a basis behind that tantrum. Long story short... I got a letter rejecting a rebate I sent in, so I called them for a smackdown and they were entirely too nice to yell at, so I felt like an ass and they accommodated me and I won without breaking a pinky nail.

This thing's gotten too long. This is what happens when I don't write in for long lengths of time. See ya'll in the next life, yeah?

Running out of amusing stories,