Sunday, September 07, 2003

A Most Unusual Midday Report

Have I mentioned how boring I am?

There are times like right now when I just want to pack it up and move to Texas (and meet Chuck Norris) or Minnesota (I saw Fargo - it seems like a nice place). I'm just so sick of being sheltered and whatnot. I mean, I haven't really ever done anything with this life of mine.

Yesterday, I was evaluating my riskiness factor based on injuries to my body. Well, let's see... Besides a stubbed thumb while playing a basketball game at my local Chuck E. Cheese's (the kids version no doubt), I can't remember a time where I was ever seriously injured. Hell, I've never been seriously injured. Never had a concussion, no broken bones... NOT EVEN A FRACTURE OR SERIOUS SPRAIN! What is that???

Gee, the most I've gotten is a callous rip on my hand when I was in S.C.A.T.S. Actually, the only thing injured on me are my eyes from excessive television viewing and internet surfing. Someone please slap me.

Screw this man. I'm just tired of taking things so carefully. I need more risks. I need to take more chances. Everyone's telling me that riding a dirt bike is "too dangerous." Screw that! So what??? Maybe I'll just sit in a plastic bubble all my life and sit at my office job down in Los Ange-- NAY-- down in Chino Hills (because Los Angeles must be "too dangerous" as well!)

Anyone want to join me sky diving? Let's just live life and if something should happen, so be it! At least you didn't die a slow agonizing death by carpal tunnel syndrome.

Epiphanastically yours,