Friday, May 21, 2004

The Season of Four Craps

Ev'ry so often there comes a blog that no one wants to read.

Welcome to that blog.

I don't know what it was I ate for the past few days (or perhaps it was because of what I didn't crap it out for the past few days)... (nah, I'm pretty sure it was the Mexican food I ate), but my stomach hurt so much at work today.

I got to the office and ate breakfast. Then I sat down to do some work and my stomach started grumbling and hurting. Really bad shooting pains and crap. Well, I held off till I couldn'tst holds no more and I went to the potty room. In the morning, no one really goes to the bathroom, so I was cool all alone, farting up a storm and such.

When some other dude came in and sat in the stall next to me, it was time to leave. I just can't poop when someone else is crapping on the other side of that thin stall wall. So I packed it up and went back to my cubicle.

One hour later, the stomach starts acting up again. So I hold off and hold off until I couldn'tst holds no more and ran to the bathroom holding on for dear life. Well, it was nearing midday, so the stalls were occupado. So I made like I just went in there to wash my hands and then I left (thinking I could hold it for a while). Well, I couldn't. So I took the elevator down to the first floor and went to that bathroom.

It's so nice! There is no one in there (save for an occasional man needed to urinate) and there are many many stalls. It also feels cleaner. So I sat there and did my business (keeping real quiet when other people came in, but letting out an occasional cough to alert them that they're not alone in case they want to fart aloud). So I finish and run back to my office.

I'm feeling better and it's lunchtime, so we go to Phillipe's for some famous French dip beef sandwiches. They were good and made me really crave The Hat. Need. Pastrami. Dip. Now. But I'm afraid it didn't help my stomach any...

An hour after lunch, my stomach hurts like hell again, so I immediately just ran to the first floor potties and crapped. Yeah... today was basically the worst day in the world. Even when I got home, I had to take another poop. Season of Four Craps.

Okay. You may all return to eating your pudding and such. Small tidbits:

1) Lee Leman, Cousin Spacey, and I went to see Urinetown the Musical last Sunday. I thought it was a lot of fun. It was really political and stuff, but done in a fun manner.


3) I bought the new New Found Glory album and they did it again. I can't believe it. The first thing I said after I put in the Sticks and Stones album was "Wow, they did it again." Well, they did it again again. Catalyst rocks. I'm a little disappointed that the last song on the album isn't as great a ending note as the previous albums. Ballad for the Lost Romantics and The Story So Far (and even The Goodbye Song) are all great departing notes. Not sure if Who Am I? lives up to my expectations yet. To be honest, I haven't really given it a good listen yet. I'm addicted to All Down Hill From Here and This Disaster.

Okay, I won't say no more. Oh one more thing... the picture from my last blog doesn't work. I hate this crap.

Losing my sense of scent,