This week was a toughy. After a few months of being told that the floor we work on was being dropped from the lease, we were all ushered into a meeting with the Chief Product Officer last Tuesday morning and told that our positions in the company were being eliminated. The job duties will be shipped to Plano, TX and we are free to apply for them if we want. Otherwise we would be still employed until closer to the end of 2013 where we will be transitioning our work to the new team before being given the official boot from the company.
So ends my nearly 10 year stint with Transamerica. The company has changed dramatically from the time I first joined. Whereas we used to be very appreciated as employees and genuinely felt that it was the people who made the company great.. nowadays the focus has shifted to a purely numbers drive. Let's meet goals goals goals. They told us that the decision was a purely business decision and nothing personal. Wow, so thank you for reaffirming that we the people mean absolutely nothing to you. No matter if we did the best job a department could ever do, we would have been cut anyway. And two weeks right after "Employee Appreciation Week" to boot.
To be honest, this company was never my true passion. The work was fine and I loved the people I worked with, but it was never my intention to jump into the life insurance business. My mom originally pulled me in to help in her area and suddenly I got roped into an amazing department with the best bosses a guy could ask for. The work was challenging at times and rewarding as well, but lately I've felt that there's no role in this industry that I want to advance towards. But the pay being great and the people being amazing, I found it near impossible to leave on my own accord. So this layoff might be a blessing in disguise. I just wish everyone else in the department didn't have to lose their jobs as well. :(
I was just rereading the blog entry from when I first started with the company. It was way back when I first started this blog. Here and here. I talked about losing my free time and getting my first paycheck and being content with how much I was earning. It was like peanuts back then, but I was young. I bought an iPod with that first paycheck! Sigh. Makes me kind of sad that this part of my life is coming to an end.
Also at the beginning of this year, if you remember, I told Jose that 2013 would be our year; that great things were upon us. And right off the bat I met Greg. We are still together nearing 6 months and I could not be more happy to be with him. I think about him constantly. Everything was moving along just fine until this axe came crashing down on me. But maybe this is 2013's plan; a plan that's being set into motion for the best career change possible for me and my future. I'm excited to see what comes of this, but scared all the same.
I still can't spill the beans yet on my niece's birthday gift that I worked on for over 8 months. I can say that I finished it and am ready to give it to Peytan when we all visit New York this month to welcome the new baby. But I can also say that while working on this gift, I had an epiphany that I could do this for a living. This is what I loved. I felt the passion in the work that I did. And I think I want to follow this feeling.
And I feel like with the support of my amazing parents and family and friends and a caring/sweet boyfriend, I can do anything. I'm excited to close this chapter and start a new one all my own.